I hate answering the phone, and that's okay.

I hear a lot of people diss young folks for not answering their phones and preferring texting.  The message is that you aren't a real adult if you don't answer your phones, and that being a phone answerer makes you superior.  I'd like to take a moment to call bullshit on that, for a multitude of reasons.

First, and most personally, as an introvert, phone calls are abrupt and unexpected invasions of my personal space.  Unless the phone call has been arranged in advance, I'm never prepared to talk to the person calling, unless its one of three people: my mom, my husband, or my best friend.  And even if the phone call has been arranged in advance, I usually spend 5-10 minutes mentally preparing for talking on the phone.  When a call comes in on the fly, I have no time to prepare.  I don't know what the call will be about, and I have to come up with a response off the cuff.  Texting and email are wonderful for me because they come in and I'm not required to respond immediately or vocally.  Being able to formulate a response and compose it through writing makes my life infinitely happier.

Second, historically phones are actually not the norm.  Phones have only been around for the past 140 years of human history and prior to that, people communicated either in-person or through written means.  Human beings have spent much more time in our history communicating via written word than via a disembodied voice on either ends of a telephone line.  Don't get me wrong, phones are amazing.  It's so awesome to be able to talk to people all around the world in real time, but as a whole, humans aren't used to communicating in that way.

Thirdly, phones, in their current cellular iteration are even more invasive than phones have been.  For 90% of the time phones have existed, you haven't had one on your person at all times.  Phones were attached to a wall and in specific places.  When you were out and about running errands, you weren't worried about getting a call, because your phone was at home stuck to the wall.  Now I'm expected to be available anywhere and everywhere, regardless of what I might be doing at that time.  I'm expected to drop what I'm doing right then and answer the phone and give that person my full attention for however long they need.  That expectation is, frankly, ridiculous.  

So no, I probably won't answer your call (and not just because my phone has mysteriously, maybe miraculously, stopped ringing unless it's unlocked).  It's not because I'm dissing you, it's not because I am maliciously ignoring you (I am ignoring you but not because I don't like you), it's not because I don't think you and what you have to say are important.  It's because I get to choose when people get to talk to me on the phone, I'm not available 24/7, for my own mental and emotional health.  You should feel allowed to ignore calls too and not feel bad about it.  This is not to say ignore calls and never call/text people back, if you never call anyone back you actually might be a dick.